12/18/2015

Muslims Invade Our Schools with Calligraphy and Nobel Peace Prizes

The stupiding of the country continues apace as this week brings us two incidents of pants-shitting over fake creeping Shariah or Islamization or some such shit. They're both from high schools, and they demonstrate that intolerance, fear of outsiders, and overreaction to perceived slights is something that people of all faiths share.

In Augusta County, Virginia, schools are closed today not because of a hoax terrorist attack threat. Oh, no, it's for something real: forced Arabic calligraphy. In an effort to show how goddamn hard it is to write in Arabic with our Western brains, an exercise in a freshman class at Riverheads High School asked students to write a common phrase, the Islamic proclamation of faith. The students weren't asked to pledge eternal fealty to Allah and follow the Prophet Muhammad. They were told to copy some words in another language.

Sure, it's a stupid choice for the calligraphy exercise, but the freakout was impressive. Parents lost their little fucking minds In a Facebook post of the damned, Highlands HS mom Kimberly Herndon, whose precious angel was subjected to faith-poisoning by the existence of alternative ways of believing in God, wrote, "This creed is connected to Jihad in that it is the chant that is shouted while beheading those of Christian faith, or people of the cross as being called by ISIS. Christian girls in this class were called to volunteer to adorn the apparal (sic) of Muslim women. Unknowingly these children did so. Also unknowingly they were instructed to denounce our Lord by copying this creed of Islam." To show just how religion doesn't make anyone crazy, Herndon wrote that God hisself demanded she act: "I will not apologize for my anointment from the Lord. Am I qualified to handle something like this? I do have some qualifications in my skill set however, I never thought I would be in this position. God doesn't call the qualified he qualifies the called." Then it devolves into all caps Lord screeching.

Of course, everyone lost their shit. Of course, the school board decided to close all schools in the district. The logical conclusion is that once a teacher assigns students to write in Arabic that Allah doesn't suck donkey balls, it's just a matter of time before students are being beheaded in the lunchroom.

Up in New Jersey, a former high school history teacher, who is Muslim, is suing her school district for firing her this year for, she claims, various acts of doing things while Muslim. For instance, in 2013, like a white history teacher in her school, Sireen Hashem showed a video of Nobel Peace Prize-winning teenager Malala Yousafzai speaking. Parents complained, and her principal told her to knock off the whole teaching Muslim stuff because she, being Muslim, was obviously less qualified to do so. She also taught an assigned book, The Lemon Tree, which is a true story about a friendship between a Palestinian and an Israeli. A parent was upset about the book and that Hashem was Muslim and teaching it. A student posted on Facebook (of course) that Hashem's brother was a terrorist and that she is anti-Semitic. This was followed by more complaints about Hashem doing the exact same approved exercises as non-Muslim teachers and being criticized for it.

The next year is going to be something of a tipping point in how non-Muslims handle the Muslim population of the United States. We can be total dicks about it and then, one day, look back wistfully and a bit embarrassed about how fucking stupid we were. Or we can just skip that step and act like they're just us.